PETA Employment Application

Contributed by Jeff

Please fill out this form completely, non-completed applications will be executed. Any answers other than "yes" will disqualify you from employment.

1. Have you ever been convicted of a felony? yes no
2. Have you ever doctored photos with fake blood using photoshop? yes no
3. Are you familiar with the proper use and storage of pentobarbital? yes no
4. Are you an air headed movie star? yes no
5. Do you feel your opinion is better than everyone else? yes no
6. Have you released all of your pets free into the wild on Hollywood blvd? yes no
7. Have you been nurtured? yes no
8. Can you remember to CLOSE the top of a dumpster after a hard days work? yes no
9. Would say your personality is like a sheep because they are cute and sweet? yes no
10. Are you a playboy playmate that takes your clothes off for guys around and think you have more class than everyone else? yes no
11. Do you have a lack of morals and have no problem distributing bull$h1t propaganda? yes no
12. Do you believe that children are our future and we should start brainwashing now? yes no

Thank you for applying at PETA and we hope you have a great sunshine filled day. Please take a sample of our vegi steak tar tar on your way out.

Taken from The Crazy Rants of Samantha Burns

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About waynem

As a Minnesota based photographer and artist I have been greatly influenced by the Upper Midwest. I focus my skills and energies on portraits, landscapes, cityscapes, architectural and fine art work. My best work comes from images first painted in my mind. I mull over a prospective image for weeks or months, seeing it from different angles and perspectives, then finally deciding what to capture. The result is images that deeply touch people's emotions and powerfully evoke memories and dreams. My images are used commercially by companies and organizations ranging from Financial Services firms, mom and pop Ice Cream shops and The Basilica of St Mary to communicate their shared vision and values. Book and magazine publishers have featured my images on their covers. My photographs also grace and enhance the decor of many fine homes.
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